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For a long time I wrote only about my brother,
or, more accurately, about his death
(okay, his suicide), but to this day
some five years later, I still don't know
if I understand anything more now
about why he killed himself, or even
about my own feelings, or whether I even
should have written those poems about my brother,
or if I should be writing this one, now.
Did writing them help me to "cope with his death,"
allow me to "work through it"? I don't know.
Or was I only putting off the...