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Think about the last time you were at dinner with a group of friends and you witnessed two people trying to talk through a tough issue. How did it go?
* Did they exchange opinions?
* Did they genuinely listen to and consider what one another had to say?
* Did they penetrate the heart of the matter?
* Did they talk past each other?
* Did they forge a new common understanding?
* Did they listen to respond – or listen to understand?
Listening to Respond vs. Listening to Understand
Last week, a friend and I were having a debate in the truest sense of the word. You might have even called it combative, a quarrel, a fight, or said we were “at war.” For topics with even the most modest amount of intensity, people tend to spend their time waiting for the first opportunity to offer their own opinions, conclusions, and point of view. In some ways, the send button is stuck, and the receive button is broken. Instead of listening, people are just...