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RECIPE FOR PROACTIVE GIRLS: MIX EQUAL PARTS "GOOD GIRL" AND "BAD GIRL"
The Secret Lives of Girls: What Good Girls Really Do-Sex Play, Aggression, and Their Guilt. By Sharon Lamb. New York: Free Press, 2002, 256 pages. Paper, $24.00.
Who is the "Good Girl"? She is the one who stands in stark contrast to those other girls. You know, those girls who enjoy sexual pleasures, delight in some forms of aggression, and are loud and boisterous. In The Secret Lives of Girls, Sharon Lamb gives us a glimpse into the lives of girls who strive to uphold the good girl image while occasionally experiencing guilty pleasures, and those girls who unfairly (and at times proudly) wear the "Bad Girl" label. Through both rich and personal narratives, Lamb demonstrates the complexity of girls' lives; girls are at once sexual and innocent, aggressive and sweet. And that is okay.
I must note that Lamb does not integrate a vast amount of the current sexuality research literature into her portrayal of girls' sexuality in this book. Nevertheless, drawing on her interviews with nearly 125 women and girls of various ethnicities and socioeconomic backgrounds, the author demonstrates a keen understanding of some of the questions and struggles that girls face. Lamb relays that, in many of the interviews, the women and girls followed the telling of their stories by asking, "Am I normal?" Are stripteases, games of doctor and "chase and kiss," and sexual play with same-sex peers within the repertoire of "normal" childhood behavior? Lamb offers a perspective on these questions that comes from the girls' stories themselves and from her understanding of what is included in the words and what is left unsaid. What is most important about Lamb's perspective is that she doesn't presume to know the whole story of the girls' and women's lives. Lamb acknowledges the limitations of gathering information regarding the "true" experiences of the women she interviewed, and she voices concerns about capturing the essence of their lives. Of course, these concerns are always at the forefront of those who do qualitative research. Even so, Lamb is able to highlight key themes that emerge throughout the stories she hears, and perhaps demonstrates that some of the truths are universal.
The book is...